Hi there! I'm Meg Joyce.
Yeah this page is supposed to be about me, but I'm going to start by asking YOU a question...
Who are you?
Are you a parent? Are you a spouse? Are you your job?
No... you are YOU. And that's the point.
Because for a REALLY long time... I wasn't me. I was all sorts of things for other people: a daughter to my parents, a mom to my kiddo, a wife to my husband, a helper, a business owner, a friend. All of those things were great... but they came at a cost.
And at the same time as being all those things, I was also still stuck in the past. I was still a kid who didn't feel heard, a pre-teen who felt invisible, a teen who felt too observed. I was living out the past every day and stretching myself SO THIN to make up for all of my mistakes... and at the end of each day there just wasn't anything left.
I felt compelled to be all things, and to strive for perfection as proof that I wasn't a screw-up, but... why?
My identity was tied up in how I imagined other people saw me.
And the important word there is imagined... because none of it was real. And I know that now.
The judgement I felt from my peers, the criticism I felt coming from family, people remembering all of my mistakes and failings... it wasn't real. It was inside of me.
And even if it was real, it didn't matter. No one outside of my body and my mind gets to tell me who I am. I don't have to push myself to the breaking point to make anyone else happy. I don't have to quiet the pieces of myself that I love, or that need the most love from me, in order to live up to a standard that I never agreed to and no one actually ever set for me.
So I stopped asking who I was. I stopped looking outside of myself for answers and started listening to the pieces of me that I'd been ignoring for a really long time.
Now... I am me.
And it feels AMAZING!!!
I'll be honest, it was really weird at the start. Some of the most surprising and exciting moments on my own journey of identity were those wild moments where I got to meet myself. And I don't mean that in a woo-woo, meditation kind of way. I mean that in a "wow... I forgot that about myself" kind of way.
The WOW moments when I remembered:
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That I am creative... after years of being disconnected from my inner artist (who literally went to college for art!!).
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That I am smart and have things to say... after being silenced in a bad relationship over a decade ago.
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That I don't have to be perfect or the best at literally anything... after spending a lifetime telling that to other people but not giving myself the same kindness.
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That I like doing things that aren't work... after years of teaching myself that I was only as valuable as I was productive and that my worth was measured by my income.
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That I'm a fun person who likes doing fun things... instead of worrying what other people will think of me and how they'll criticize or judge me in the fun-having.
I cannot stress to you enough how BIG these things all felt. And how strange and foreign they all were at the start. It's taken me years to get as far along this path as I am now, and I know there's still a ways to go. But I'm not scared of it anymore, I'm SO EXCITED!!! Because every step that I've taken toward being myself and living into my true identity has brought me SO MUCH JOY.
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My relationships are stronger (because I'm not quietly resenting the people I love)
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My work feels lighter and WAY more fun (because I'm leaning into the things I'm naturally good at and not making my whole life about work)
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I'm able to try new things and discover new pieces of myself (because I'm not so scared I'll be bad at them that I don't even try)
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And most importantly, I love myself exactly as I am. (which makes it easier for me to accept love from the people around me)
My life before this work felt like one long identity crisis. "Who am I??" "How do I fit into this world??"
I was constantly trying to be someone, instead of just letting myself be.
Not the perfect friend, not the best employee, not the pristine homemaker or perfect mom... just... me.
And Now I know that 'me' isn't just enough, it's the point.
So.. what if what YOU'RE going through isn’t an identity crisis, what if your identity is just… always in process?
And if that's true, it means you can change without feeling like you're losing yourself.
When identity isn't a box you have to stay inside, you can grow. You can outgrow old dreams, change direction, discover new interests, and become someone you couldn't have imagined being five years ago.
Follow along on MY journey as I discover my own identity in process. Expect curiosity. Expect a few plot twists. Expect to look at something familiar and see it completely differently.
You never know exactly where curiosity will take you.
That's the fun part.
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